As I have been in anxious anticipation for the YABC solo email to arrive, I have had some time to realise that waiting is an incredibly unpleasant activity. And it seems that, unfortunately and ironically, it is a major part of many peoples lives. We are always waiting for something new to happen, or something better to turn up. Waiting for the right person, for the right time to do something, for news or results or the next step in our career. I think it could be an integral part of human nature, because even when a time comes when I've received all the news I've been expecting, gotten all my results, done everything on my to-do list, and finally have a moment of relative peace and quiet, somehow or another I invent something else to wait for. And then the whole cycle starts again.
In that case, I suppose I bring it upon myself. The truth is, as much as I complain about being incredibly busy with lots to do, I don't like it when I'm not busy. I like to have things to do, aim towards and (although I cringe when I write this) wait for. So therefore I force myself to go through the unpleasant task of awaiting things. I don't have to audition for shows or solo's, or send my manuscript to editors, or even try to get into WAAPA.
Okay so I suppose it's decided that the majority of waiting that us folks complain about only happens because we let it. Sure, we blame other people for our suffering, but in essence, if we didn't want to get whatever was on the end of that torturous wait, we wouldn't bother, would we?
Therefore, waiting is a manmade means of torture by which we . . . test our character? Our strength?
Patience is a virtue. You can't expect to have it without a little bit of practice of twiddling your thumbs and nervously biting your lip while you wait.
Not that I want more practice, but I do need more patience. I'm pretty terrible. Right now, waiting for my solo email, I check my inbox at least twenty times a day. And then groan when I see that STILL there is no email. This drawing out of quite a simple task sets my mind wandering and then, as much as I try to discourage it, I tend to dream about all the possible outcomes . . . In one case I get my dream solo, then four solo's (none of which makes sense. I happened to be offered 'Netball and Peter Pan' as one of my solo's. I have absolutely NO idea where that came from) and then finally I got no solo's at all.
So. Waiting. A game? I think not. Unless we're talking mind games, because while I certainly wouldn't add 'waiting' to my list of fun activities for game day along with monopoly and yhatzee, I would certainly say it's a mentally damaging pass time. Then again, yhatzee can be pretty cruel.