I think...

So I'm at that time again in which I have to play the waiting game. Some of you may remember my previous post about it (if you would like to read it, here you go!). In this post I was waiting the arrival of my Solo email for YABC. While I have recieved my email already for this semester, I'm still playing the game of endless patience while I wait for an email about an audition I just did for a show I REALLY want to get into.

So yes, I realised the irony of the repetition in my life and it got me thinking - and then I thought

HOLD IT.

Emily, why must you always stop and think about these things?




Paradoxically that got me thinking about over-thinking. A tendency that I have and suffer from.

I think about things too much, and I bet you any money that many other people think this as well. I'm constantly looking into things too deeply, trying to gouge out some further important meaning from trivial things.



An analogy I can think of is a story our Tap teacher was telling us about in YABC the other week. He said he was teaching the 'Cool' dance sequence from West Side Story to a bunch of Uni students. While teaching it, these intellectuals were asking things like 'What does this move symbolise?' and 'How does a triple pirouette here refer to the ever-declining respect and tolerance of today's social and ethnic minorities?'

My Tap teacher could only think 'It's a dance. You dance it.'

Essentially, I'm trying to say that I try to ask these questions about things that really I shouldn't bother because that's not their point.



I find that I overthink things the most in a few situations. For example:

• Boys. This is a give in. Girls are always trying to decode what a boy could possibly be meaning when he says this, or what this smile or that laugh can tell you about their feelings. In all honesty, most of my artful interpretations are nonsense and I bet I'm wrong about everything so really, I should learnt to stop over-thinking it.


• Auditions. For some reason, after an audition, my brain kind of fogs out the details and to compensate for this, I fabricate to fill in the blanks. This is a bad thing. I suddenly see the hmmms or the bland reactions as satanic portents of doom and a failed career.


• Days of Nothing. This refers to the days in which I laze about, play Sims, watch a movie and do pretty much nothing worth while. A day like this bites back at me once I'm trying to go to sleep. My brain, painfully ianctive for a full 12 hours, takes it's revenge by buzzing non-stop with thoughts about everything under the sun. This is when the majority of my over-thinking/analysing takes place, because the first two dot-points like to invade and have their say as well as everything else.

Yes. Overthinking, one of life's major pests.